Secret to Change

Change is hard for most of us. If it was easy, humans would be able to change their situation at will. If change was easy, people would frequently engage in life changing activities. But change is not easy, it is often very difficult.

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The very thought of change can steep fear into our hearts because change often requires us to step into the unknown or unpredictable. For example, some people stay in a job they despise because the fear associated with changing jobs is too great. This natural tendency for humans to avoid the unpredictable is the reason change requires high motivation. The pain of staying put must be greater than the pain of moving on.

But once we understand change can happen, we start to be better equipped. New Year’s Resolutions are infamous for being broken because change is much harder than we usually anticipate!

Before we embark on change we must ask ourselves one question. Are we wanting to change ourselves or for another person? Often, it is someone else that we wish would change. Given that we find it difficult to change ourselves, it is unrealistic to believe that others should change because we want them to. It usually doesn’t happen. So what is the secret to change?

Changing ourselves will often bring about change in other people. We create change by changing OUR responses, OUR attitudes, OUR behaviours.

The ability to change our world lies within us. We are not born with our beliefs, attitudes and many of our behaviours. We learn them and over time they become habits that seem part of us. Change is a process that usually involves quelling our fears and gaining the practical skills to better manage our habits. Sometimes we need to deal with our anger, or grief or our losses so we can move on. We may want to parent more effectively or to respond to our loved ones in ways that allow THEM to change. Any way we look at it, change starts with ourselves.

There are many ways in which Relationships Australia can help you be successful with change. It is also a journey that many people take to help make their lives happier and more productive. Please feel free to browse our helpful and inexpensive educational courses and other services we offer.


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